Preparing to Evacuate

1 May

I always imagined that as I closed in on the end of my career I’d have one last, really important briefing note to submit. Or there’d be some time-critical bi-monthly financial report that would have to be updated – a race against the calendar to get the numbers in by “conclusion of business” (manager-speak for “before I get into work tomorrow”). I blame Hollywood, Bollywood, and Hollywood North for why these last few days at work have not played out as I imagined they would.

Instead things have been pretty quiet. I’ve been trying to get a FAwPV – that’s the EGOT of time-off with pay. Don’t be fooled, it’s not as easy as it sounds. I’ve also been able to review the various HR policies related to the different types of leave entitlements. And let me tell you, I should have read this stuff *years* ago – you wouldn’t believe what’s in there.

During my research I discovered that there’s no legal way for an employer to regulate bathroom breaks. Apparently, in the eyes of the law, the bathroom stalls in government buildings are these mini porcelain sanctuaries. If a worker were so inclined, he or she could spend several *hours* each day “on” the toilet and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. This is based on an actual dispute between the government and one of its employees where the lawyers from the Justice Department were unable to come to a consensus on a legal definition for “going to the bathroom”. Amazing.

Because reading the new Harry Potter book at home would interfere with valuable jigsaw puzzle time.

Because reading the new Harry Potter book at home would interfere with valuable jigsaw puzzle time.

2 Responses to “Preparing to Evacuate”

  1. Andre May 16, 2013 at 07:30 #

    Maybe I should start leaving these… I have enough tales to write a book of stuff called, “Des histoires de gars saoul” which to help with translations means, stupid things drunk guys do! I will save your blog site and come visit once in a while. Hopefully, we can hook up for turkey supper with Shawn and Karinne and the little one, whose apparently already eating solid foods. Cheers, and all the best to you.

  2. Sang May 24, 2013 at 13:43 #

    It’s the governmental equivalent of Church Sanctuary. As long as you’re in the confessional, they can’t come get you.

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