Die Hard Three

It appears this adventure is slowly coming to an end. We’re booked on a flight out of Newark at 20:40 to YUL and then we have to take a bus back to Ottawa – ETA: 01:30 Thursday. I’m pretty disappointed to be missing Hallowe’en – I organized a kick-ass party that I won’t be able to attend. Someone needs to develop a Facebook filter that will block out all the awesomeness one does not want to be reminded of.

I was recently asked to provide a list of lessons learned from this trip. Now I know that technically the trip is not over. And I am also aware that the remaining nineteen hours could produce many nuggets of wisdom. So here is what I propose – if I learn anything useful between now and when I get home, I will make a separate post describing my learnedness. Deal? Thank you. So here is your list.

• New York motorists are the most thoughtful of any city I’ve ever been to. If all the traffic lights are out and you’re waiting  at a crosswalk with a hundred other people they’ll stop without any prompting and let everyone cross.
• For the purposes of airport security, peanut butter is considered a liquid.
• You can always depend on the kindness of strangers.
• Starting up your own art gallery in New York is really, really hard. Especially if Chantal doesn’t pull her weight.

There is some crazy shit to be found in storm debris.

The United States is a fully bilingual country.

The Natural History Museum is stuck in the eighties.

And as we make our way to Newark, I want to share with you the best quote from the greatest movie ever made.

Samantha: Easy, sport. I got myself outta Beirut once, I think I can get outta New Jersey.
Mitch: Yeah? Well, don’t be so sure. Others have tried and failed. The entire population, in fact.

Killer-Death Storm Update. The good news: I’m fine. So is the GF. Bad news, Cleveland is not doing well. Just watch this shocking video.

Lots of crazy wind but no flooding where we are. Went out last night to check it out.

Just look at this tree.

There’s garbage everywhere!

We’re booked on a flight out of LGA at 08:10 Wednesday. I still have not been able to locate a can opener.

wish us luck!

This is just a test post. I got a new iPhone last week and I want to try out the blogging app.

Here’s the view from the window of the temporary shelter they sent us to.

I’m not convinced this mega-hurricane is all that. On the television they keep showing images of these kids playing on the beach in front of the waves.

If they’d just say where, I’d go join them.

Looks like we’re going to be here for a couple of days. I wonder if the movie cinemas will be open. This would be a good place to escape for a few hours…. unless…. unless that’s what the storm wants us to do…

America!

I have to come clean. Things are getting out of hand here and the truth will come to light. I don’t want to be like those politicians that are discovered to be alien replicants two days before the election.

I lied to you. Remember that blog post last year where I wrote about the time I was in the army where I was first in my class in all the survival training courses? Well that wasn’t exactly true. See I was in the army but it was the Salvation Army. And I wasn’t taking any courses, I was trying to get rid of an old mattress.

I just got back from a supply run. The GF asked me to get some provisions in the event things get really bad tomorrow. I was walking around this tiny grocery store. They had lots of stuff but I had no idea what to buy. Here is what I ended up with.

Does anyone have a can opener?

I have no idea what I’m doing.

By now you’ve probably heard the news. At a minimum you’ve read the title of this post. Flights – all canceled. Supplies – running low. Power – failing intermittently. Law and Order – only reruns.

We got back to the hotel and it was all boarded up. We pleaded with the doorman. Told him that we guests of the hotel. He just turned us away. It’s so cold outside. We have to find shelter. And food. So hungry. The only thing we have to eat is this Star Trek cookie.

but we can’t eat it cause it loses it’s value when you take it out of the package.

.

We managed to make it out of the cafetorium with our bellies full and our wallets empty. $35 for a salad? That’s too much! The spider exhibit was too expensive so we went to the Hall of African Mammals. We still have not rebooked our tickets. We tried to get on a flight leaving NYC today but all the planes have been diverted to their alternate airports.

Time is running short. The storm is approaching, the subway and all public transportation is shutting down at 19:00 (in three hours) and there are two items left on our itinerary for this trip. Help us figure out what to do

a) visit with the GF’s friend Katrina and finish the box of wine she started last night

b) go see that new Ben Affleck movie Argos (I think it’s about the founding of the Canadian Football League)

or do we go to the circus?

.

I don’t know what to do. The GF and I are stuck here in New York. Stranded. Our flight on Monday has been cancelled.

Knocking on death’s door?

Businesses an entrepreneurs have started profiteering and hoarding – $70 for 1000 millilitres of water sounds like a good deal – it’s not.

Because I am incapable of making a decision, I’m going to let you, my readers, decide our fate. Think of this as a real-life choose your own adventure novel. Should Jason and his GF

a) leave the comforts of the free WiFi zone in the basement cafeteria of the Natural History Museum to go see the brand new spider exhibit.

or

b) get re-booked on a flight via Toronto

You decide!